A couple of week back , our Dear Leader Blam sent around an email ask the team what we wanted for Christmas . So I thought . And I think . And all I could amount up with was this :
• A new sofa cover
• A cunning , copper - colored snakeskin clasp — that ’s a bag , not something found on a car — by Luella
• A cumulus of new books ( or just an Amazon endowment certificate , actually )
• Some fabulously sexy piece of art to hang on the rampart
ZOMG — no contraption ! ? ! ! ? ? came Blam ’s amaze response . Feckity feck , I muttered , my secret is out . So I backpedalled :
Well , I typecast , at a get-up-and-go I ’d like an iPod classic , because my old 60 GB , video - gratuitous version is a bit rickety , but it does still work , so I suppose I ’ll wait until the sad , dead - iPod expression appears on the screen . And my other half , Jesus , has been tempting me with the iPhone ( like any of you are surprised ) . He is good ; I do need a new earphone as my horrible Motorola presently has a battery aliveness of around 10 moment and I HATE IT , I REALLY HATE IT , but since the iPhone has n’t get 3 one thousand , I thought I ’d wait until Mk 2 comes out . But aside from that ? Nope , nothing .
My widget are as follows : one sickly iPod ; one MacBook ; one shitty original Motorola RAZR that I will feed to the gizmo - eating unicorns once I can be bothered to get a new earpiece . We ’ve also got a TomTom for the car , but I lost the charger for it , so that ’s that , and , truth be assure , we do n’t require it because I ’m pretty bloody good at map - reading .
Gadgets are my chore . I write about this stuff from sunrise to night , so when it comes to go - home time , I ’m pretty happy to close my laptop computer and start on a book . And no , before you suggest a Kindle , I love Christian Bible . I like them stack up dustily in my firm , I wish score them Canis familiaris - eared and awkward - paged and taking them places . And another confession : I am the clumsiest git in the world , so an iPhone / Kindle / Thanko USB Trouserpress will plausibly suffer a bathwater - electronics port in the first week .
Just because I do n’t want a gismo for Christmas does n’t needs mean that I begrudge everyone else their pile of bytes and pixels . My husband is of course crazy about stuff like this , hence the iPhone , the brand young iMac that we do n’t really have room for , the Nintendo DS — all three of them , in reality — and the remote - controlled Mario Kart that drives the cur nuts when we play with it . Both my father - in - law and my brother have go crazy over the iPhone , my bro alter his service provider for get his hands on one , the f - i - l sending someone over to NY to pick one up for him to apply in Spain .
Nevertheless , Blam ’s question bugged me for several days , until I remember one stand - out Christmas present from my puerility , when I was eight or so .
My parent were n’t quite selfless enough to buy me a drumfish kit I ’d ask for , but they did corrupt me a cheapo cassette musician . Not some fabulous ghetto blaster that I could strut around the bad - ass farm racetrack at home with , like Radio Rakeem , but a tiny little mono version , and three tapes : The Jungle Book ; and The Young Person ’s Guide(s ) to Mozart and Beethoven which , when I opine about it , must have hone my fixation with ’ 70 disco , funk , Chicago House and the Sugarhill Gang .
Crap mag tape by , I hearted my tape player . I hearted it with everything I had . I took it to school to show off in the resort area , punctually getting it attach for a week — no more Baloo for you , you loathsome girlfriend — and it remained the unaired thing to heaven . I ca n’t even remember what stigma it was , probably something uber - shonk , like Alba , or Crown . But I loved it . I customize it with my baby ’s carmine nail polish , pose cute Japanese spikelet on it , and graffiti’d the sides in gold penitentiary that made me high-pitched when I get too close to the nib . Until one black day three years later , when I snapped off the red record button while singing à la Siouxie Sioux into the mic .
So , I ’m sorry , pricy Gizmodo reader , who imagine their chirpy AM gadget reporter to be as plugged in as the Borg Queen herself . The truth is , a one-fourth - century on , I ca n’t think of anything made of metal , plastic and silicon which fire up up , beep , or goes “ Pew Pew , ” which will bestow me anywhere about to the delight of Christmas back then , and that dear , beautiful ultra - sleazy cassette deck of cards .
Happy Holidays !
all giz wantsChristmasGadgets
Daily Newsletter
Get the dependable technical school , science , and culture news in your inbox daily .
News from the future , delivered to your present .
You May Also Like
